The Top Table: Who Sits Where at a Wedding?

Sophia Shafiee
Last updated: 4th Jun 2024

When it comes to wedding receptions, the top table is the star of the show. It’s the front and centre stage where the most important people in your life will share in the joy of your special day. 

Traditionally, the bride, groom, bride’s parents, groom’s parents, the best man, and the maid of honour sit at the top table. The bride and groom sit in the middle, their respective best man and maid of honour sit next to them, and then the parents sit next to them. 

But who says we have to stick to tradition? Keep reading for a comprehensive guide to who sits where at the wedding top table, including 11 ideas for non-traditional wedding top table layouts. 

What is a top table at a wedding?

Photo © Ink and Alder | See their Bridebook profile

The top table at a wedding is the main table at the wedding reception. This is where the bride and groom sit along with their closest family and friends. It’s usually positioned in a prominent location so that everyone can see the happy couple and their nearest and dearest. 

Wedding top tables can be any shape and size. There are traditional seating patterns for wedding top tables. But, it’s your special day, and the most important thing is that you have those around you whom you love and trust the most. So, pick whoever you want to sit at the top table and follow an arrangement that feels right for you. 

Who sits at the top table at a wedding?

Photo © Stingray Events | See their Bridebook profile

Traditionally, the bride, groom, bride’s parents, groom’s parents, the best man, and the maid of honour sit at the top table at a wedding. The bride and groom sit in the middle, their respective best man and maid of honour sit next to them, and then the parents sit next to them, often in the following order:

  • On the bride’s side: maid of honour, bride’s mum, bride’s dad, or any other gendered parent.
  • On the groom’s side: best man, groom’s mum, groom’s dad, or any other gendered parent.
Wedding traditional top table seating arrangement
Traditional top table plan: bride and groom’s families on either side

Alternatively, sometimes the traditional wedding table order might alternate the respective relations of the bride and groom as follows:

  • On the bride’s side: best man, groom’s mum, bride’s dad, or any other gendered parent.
  • On the groom’s side: maid of honour, groom’s dad, bride’s mum, or any other gendered parent.
Wedding traditional top table seating arrangement
Traditional top table plan: bride and groom’s families on different sides

Whatever arrangement your decide, this is your big day, and you can ask anyone you’d like to sit at the top table with you. Some people only want their besties by their side, while others prefer the company of siblings. Whatever you choose, your happiness is what matters most.

It’s also important to note that this is only the traditional arrangement. In these progressive times, modern couples are rewriting the rules to better reflect their personal identities and values. Each couple may have their own unique arrangement, especially for LGBTQ+ couples or those who wish to embrace gender-neutral or inclusive practices. 

11 traditional and creative wedding top table plans

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Looking for some more unusual top table seating plans? Check out these 11 top table seating arrangements to help you get started. 

1) Traditional top table layout

A beautifully decorated wedding table adorned with white drapes and illuminated with small lights. The table is set with plates of food, drinks, and napkin holders, with high, white cushioned chairs behind it. The background features soft, glowing curtains.

The traditional top table layout is where the bride and groom sit in the middle of the table and their nearest and dearest surround them in a specific order,

As above, the best man and maid of honour sit next to the bride and groom, followed by their respective parents. This layout puts the couple at the heart of the celebration, flanked by those who have supported them the most.

2) Sweetheart top table layout

An elegantly decorated sweetheart table with a white tablecloth is set up in a luxurious venue. The table features floral arrangements, greenery, and a "Mr & Mrs" sign. In the background, there are mirrors, chandeliers, and wall sconces adding to the sophisticated ambiance.

If you’re looking for something a little more intimate, the sweetheart wedding table is the perfect choice.

The sweetheart wedding table is a table for just the bride and groom. There are no distractions, no chattering family — just you and your new spouse sharing this magical moment. 

3) Wedding party top table layout 

A large group of people seated at a long, outdoor dining table adorned with colorful flowers and tableware, raising their glasses in a celebratory toast. The setting is surrounded by trees, creating a festive and enchanting atmosphere.

If you’d rather bring the party to the top table, consider having your parents sit at a table designated for the family and invite your whole wedding party to sit at the top table. Friends are the family you choose, after all!

You may want to have your maid of honour and best man sat next to you, for the sake of tradition. Alternatively, mix it up and intersperse your bridesmaids and groomsmen along the table, creating a lively and dynamic atmosphere. This layout allows you to be surrounded by your closest friends, ensuring a fun and celebratory vibe at the heart of the reception.

4) Cuties only top table layout

Three young children are seated at a table during a formal wedding event. The children are engaged with colorful toys and a few snacks. The child on the left is wearing a vest and looking to the side, while the other two children focus on their toys.

Hold up, hold up — cuties only at this table, please!

This table has the flower girls and page boys sitting at the top table with you. If your kids are involved in your wedding, you have a niece or nephew you’re especially close to, or simply just want to give them a lasting memory, this is the perfect layout.

Imagine their little faces lighting up when they realise they get to sit with the newlyweds! Not only does this make the day extra special for them, but it also adds an adorable touch to your reception.

5) For the speeches

A group of people are seated around a decorated table on a boat. The table has food, flowers, and drinks. A man in a white shirt is standing, speaking while raising a glass, with balloons in the background. The setting is bright and festive with a seaside view.

Keep things practical and only have people seated at the top table who are making a wedding speech. This gives you flexibility over who sits with you and ensures those delivering speeches are easily accessible. Plus, it can streamline the reception and keep everyone’s attention focused where it needs to be during those heartfelt moments.

6) Keep it old-school

A bride and an older woman, possibly her mother or grandmother, share a tender moment. Both are seated and leaning their heads together with their eyes closed, smiling. The bride wears a white dress, veil, and pearls, while the older woman wears a light-coloured dress.

Invite your grandparents to sit at your top table and share the magical memories for your special day with them. This layout honours their place in your life and adds a touch of nostalgia and warmth to the celebration. Plus, the photos will be adorable. 

7) Nearest and dearest

Invite your mum, dad, favourite cousin, or best uncle to sit at the top table with you and revel in the support of your nearest and dearest. 

We know a traditional top table will be heavily family-dominated. But, incorporating the family members who mean the most to you will not only honour the role they’ve played in your life, but  also create a warm, intimate, and unique atmosphere at the heart of your reception. 

8) Siblings only table

A bride in a white wedding dress and veil is sitting on an ornate couch with a bouquet of orange flowers beside her. Two women in blue dresses stand beside her, one with her hands on the bride’s shoulder, all smiling and looking joyful.

They’ve been your best friend since day one, they know you better than anyone else, and they loved you even during those awkward teenage years. Why wouldn’t you want these special people at your top table? We’re talking about siblings.

Of course, we respect that everyone has a different relationship with their siblings. But, if your brothers and/or sisters have been your confidants, cheerleaders, and partners in crime, having a siblings-only top table could be the perfect way to honour those unique bonds.

9) Best friends for life

A joyful bride and her three bridesmaids sit laughing and smiling on a wooden deck by the ocean. The bride holds a drink and one bridesmaid playfully lifts her leg, while another holds a bouquet of flowers. They are all dressed in light-coloured gowns.

Invite your besties to share the special memories and sit at the top table with you and your new spouse. If you have multiple best men or maids of honour, or simply couldn’t imagine your day without your besties by your side, consider opting for this fun and unusual top table layout. 

10) Musical chairs 

Aerial view of a group of people seated at a long outdoor table, sharing a meal. The table is set with plates, cutlery, various dishes, and flowers. The gathering takes place on a grassy lawn, with sunlight casting shadows around the scene.

If you don’t love the idea of a top table but still want to enjoy the company of your closest friends and family throughout the reception, consider a ‘musical chairs’ approach.

With this setup, you and your spouse move around to different tables during the meal, spending time with various groups of guests. This way, you can personally connect with more people and ensure everyone feels included in your special day.

Have a few extra, empty seats set up at each wedding table and then make your way around each table during the wedding reception. You and your new spouse could either go together, or tag team to make sure you hit every table. If you’d prefer the second option, try to carve out a little time in the middle with them to ensure you don’t miss out on their company during your wedding reception. 

Pro tip: You’ll need to clear this one with your caterers and wedding venue. As much as we’re sure they’d be happy to accommodate, it’s best to give them the heads up so they aren’t chasing you around with your beef wellington! 

11) No top table/inclusive seating arrangement

A joyful outdoor wedding celebration with guests dancing and clapping. The bride, in a white dress and floral headpiece, dances with a young child in her arms. The sun sets in the background, casting a warm glow over the festive scene.

FOMO got you down? Skip the top table altogether and opt for a more inclusive seating arrangement where you and your new spouse can mingle freely with your guests. We recommend having designated seats on specific wedding tables, but leaving plenty of time between wedding breakfast courses to ensure you can mingle around the room and spend time with your guests. 

This ‘top table seating arrangement’ encourages a more relaxed and interactive atmosphere, allowing you to connect personally with more people throughout the celebration. 

The bottom line on top table setting plans

Photo © Emily K Weddings | See their Bridebook profile

The top table of a wedding reception is the focal point of the celebration. It’s where the most important people in your life gather to share in your joy, and usually includes the bride, groom, both of your parents, the best man, and the maid of honour. However, there’s no need to stick strictly to tradition if you’d prefer something more fun or unusual. 

From intimate sweetheart tables to adorable cutie pie tables for the little ones, there are countless ways to make your top table uniquely yours. If you’re looking for flexibility, consider seating only those giving speeches at the top table, or if you want to keep it old-school and sentimental, invite your grandparents to share in the magic of the day. 

Whatever you choose to do, the most important thing is that your top table reflects your personality, relationships, and includes those who have supported and continue to support you most. Incorporate your nearest and dearest into your wedding reception and you’re sure to have a day filled with laughs and happy memories.

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Happy Planning!

Sophia Shafiee
Sophia is a passionate writer and editor and expert on all things wedding content related, with a First Class degree from the University of Oxford. She frequently shares her wedding advice and tips with leading UK publications on behalf of Bridebook.com, including Harper’s Bazaar, SheerLuxe and Porter Magazine.
Last updated: 4th Jun 2024