How to Write a Wedding Card Message for a Family Member

Sophia Shafiee
Last updated: 18th Oct 2023

A family member’s wedding is an extra special occasion. Not only are you there to celebrate your sister, brother, parent, or cousin’s big day, but you’re actually welcoming a new person into your extended family!

A wedding card is a great way to express your support, love, and wedding congratulations on this special day. Plus, you can express your gratitude for being invited, share any wedding wishes you have, and properly welcome your new family member to the fold. 

If you’re unsure what to include when wedding card writing, we break it down for you below. We’ve included guidance on how to write a wedding card message, ideas of things to write in a wedding card, and top tips for wedding card writing.  

What is a wedding card for a family member?

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A wedding card for a family member is a wedding card given to the newlyweds on their big day. It can be given in replacement of a gift or alongside a registry gift. There’s no need to give money in a wedding card. However, a token of £20-£30 is okay if the couple are comfortable accepting cash gifts. 

The card should be more formal in tone than a wedding card to a friend. It should contain a formal greeting, a ‘congratulations on your wedding day’ message, and then a formal sign-off. However, if you have a close relationship with your family member, try including a happy memory from your childhood or an inside joke you share. 

How to write a wedding card message for a family member

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If you’re stuck with where to begin with writing your wedding card, try following our advice below. 

A formal greeting

A wedding card to a family member will usually be more formal in tone than a wedding card to a friend. However, if you are close to your family member or have a more casual relationship, you can certainly add a more personal touch to your greeting.

A formal greeting might look like:

  • Dear [COUPLE’S NAMES]
  • To [COUPLE’S NAMES] on your special day

A congratulations message 

Your congratulations message can be as simple as “Congratulations on your wedding day” or as heartfelt as “I’m so proud of you both for taking this next step in life.”

Either way, your congratulations message should be short, sweet, and to the point. Avoid any long declarations of pride or in-depth observations about the wedding day. Although these comments might come from a good place, the right time to share your thoughts isn’t in a wedding card. 

Your pearls of wisdom

You should then move on to sharing some advice or guidance with the newlyweds. This could be your advice on love, friendship, compromise, or even the importance of communication. Remember, you don’t need to be married or have a wealth of experience to give advice. Instead, share your personal perspective on these important aspects of a successful marriage. 

For example, you could try:

  • Love is not just a feeling — it’s a choice you make every day. Choose to love each other, even when the going gets tough.
  • Take the time to communicate with each other as you decompress from work. It can seem small, but taking 20 minutes to have a cup of tea and chat about your day will keep communication open and positive.

A friendly sign-off 

Sign your card off with a friendly conclusion and your name. This can be simple, something like:

  • All my love, [YOUR NAME]
  • Thank you again for inviting me. From, [YOUR NAME]

Wedding card message structure

Check out the infographic below to help guide your writing:

How to Write a Wedding Card Message for a Family Member: Structure Guide
Follow this general structure when composing your message

Do you have to give a wedding card?

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You don’t have to give a wedding card. However, it’s a nice gesture and is often better than showing up empty-handed. Cards can be given alone, with money, or with a gift depending on your personal choice and the couple’s preferences. 

Top tips for wedding card wishes

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Use a wedding quote or poem

If you’re unsure what to include, a wedding quote, line from a reading, or poem about love is a great place to start. Check out our guide to wedding readings and love quotes to gain some inspiration. 

Handwrite your message

Where possible, you should try to handwrite your message. Although a typed message keeps the card tidy, a handwritten message adds a personal touch. Taking the time to handwrite your message will add a feeling of intimacy and thoughtfulness. 

Keep the tone light and friendly 

Keep the tone of your wedding card light and friendly. If you’re offering advice or sharing an anecdote, make sure it’s warm, positive, and optimistic. Remember, the happy couple will likely look back on their wedding cards for years to come, so leave them with words that bring a smile to their face. 

Be genuine

Your family members will know you through and through, so they’ll be able to tell if you aren’t being genuine. Let your authentic feelings shine through in your card with a positive and loving message. 

A good tip is to write as if you were speaking. Think of what you’d say to them in person on their wedding day, and express that in your card. 

The bottom line on a wedding card for a family member

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A wedding card to a family member is a great but simple way to express your gratitude for being invited, to share happy wedding wishes, and to convey your love and support to the newlyweds. 

Your wedding card doesn’t need to be extravagant or an over-the-top declaration of support to the couple. Instead, a wedding card is a happy keepsake that conveys your genuine care towards a family member on their big day. Plus, wedding cards can be given in place of, or alongside a wedding gift. 

If you’re struggling with getting started on wedding card writing, check out our post on what to include in a wedding card. We’ve got great examples of wedding card writing, as well as top tips for writing etiquette and how to be mindful of tone. 

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Happy Planning!

Sophia Shafiee
Sophia is a passionate writer and editor and expert on all things wedding content related, with a First Class degree from the University of Oxford. She frequently shares her wedding advice and tips with leading UK publications on behalf of Bridebook.com, including Harper’s Bazaar, SheerLuxe and Porter Magazine.
Last updated: 18th Oct 2023