The wedding speeches are a traditional and much-anticipated part of any wedding reception. First comes the father of the bride, then the groom, then the best man, then… it all starts to get a little hazy.
The thing is, there are a number of wedding speeches that need to be made on the big day. Guests can get bored and restless if they last too long. But if they’re not long enough, the speech-makers might feel like they haven’t done the bride or groom justice. So, how to strike the right balance while still captivating the guests?
Don’t worry, we’ve got the answers! Check out our comprehensive guide on how long each wedding speech should last, as well as some handy guidance on what each speech should include.
What is a wedding speech?
A wedding speech is a speech made by members of the wedding party during the wedding reception. There’s a traditional order of speeches that most people usually follow. However, it’s your big day, so you can absolutely shake it up if you want.
Traditionally, wedding speeches are made after the main course but before dessert during the reception meal. This timing allows your guests to be well-fed and refreshed, with a brief pause before indulging in dessert. However, if you’d prefer, you can always have the speeches after dessert, or even during the ceremony. Your wedding, your choice!
While it’s possible to give speeches before the meal is served, it’s generally not recommended — your guests might be a bit hungry after sitting through the ceremony!
How long should a general wedding speech be?
Generally, wedding speeches should last between 5 and 7 minutes to ensure there’s enough time for everyone who wants to speak. The entire “wedding speech” segment of the reception should last no more than 40 minutes to keep your guests engaged, but it usually wraps up within 20 to 30 minutes.
You can adjust the length of each speech to give everyone a fair opportunity. For example, if you only have two or three people speaking, you can allow for slightly longer speeches. However, if several members of the wedding party want to speak, it’s best to shorten each speech to keep the schedule on track.
Pro tip: To keep things balanced, divide the total time allotted for speeches by the number of speakers. For instance, if you plan to spend 30 minutes on speeches and have five people speaking, each speech would last around 5.5 minutes, with a 30-second pause in between.
Wedding Speech Lengths: Quick Reference Guide
If you’re in a rush, check out the below quick reference guide to see how long your wedding speech should ideally be. Otherwise, read on for the full breakdown, and be sure to save this infographic for future use.
How long should a father of the bride speech be?
The father of the bride’s speech is traditionally the longest speech in the order of speeches. It’s usually the first speech made during the wedding reception and is a beloved and much-anticipated part of the bride’s big day.
The father of the bride’s speech should last between 7 and 9 minutes (and ideally no more than 12, to prevent the order of speeches from becoming too lengthy.) These speeches generally include:
- A thank you to everyone involved in putting together the big day (don’t forget the staff working at the reception)
- An ode to your little girl and what makes her so special
- Your words of wisdom on love and marriage
- You could round off with some quotes about love or a beautiful wedding reading
How long should a groom’s speech be?
The groom’s speech can be a little longer than the best man’s speech. It should last between 6 and 8 minutes, but no longer than 10 for the guests’ sake.
It’s usually second in the order of speeches and should be positioned as a thank-you note to all the people who have supported your relationship and wedding planning. As a basic structure, we recommend the following general structure:
- Introduce yourself and your new bride (a guaranteed cheer!)
- Thank the groomsmen, best man, bridesmaids, and maid of honor for their continued love and support throughout your wedding planning
- Thank your parents and new parents-in-law
- A recap of your wedding vows
- Toast to your new spouse and your future together
How long should a best man speech be?
The ideal length for a best man speech is around 5 minutes. However, it can be a little longer or a little shorter, depending on your personal preferences and the overall speech order.
The best man’s speech is usually the third in the order of speeches. It should include things such as:
- A warm introduction to the reception
- Compliments about the bride
- A playful roast of the groom
- Well-wishes from the best man and groomsmen
- The Bride and Groom’s love story
- A toast to their future
How long should a maid of honor speech be?
Although untraditional, the maid of honor speech can be a beautiful part of the wedding reception. It should be on the shorter side, like the best man’s speech, and last between 4 and 6 minutes.
The beauty of a maid of honor speech is that there are no expectations, so it can take any structure you’d like! However, it’s a good idea to include:
- The adventures you’ve shared with the bride
- Anecdotes about wedding planning
- How the couple’s love story unfolded
- Heartfelt advice on relationships
- A toast to the happy couple
How long should a bridesmaid’s speech be?
As with the maid of honor speech, a bridesmaid’s speech is untraditional, so there are no expectations on how long the speech should be or what it should include. We recommend keeping the speech to around 5 minutes long (less if you’d like multiple bridesmaids to make a speech).
Having a bridesmaid’s speech after the maid of honor speech may be nice way to keep things flowing. We suggest that you consider the following structure:
- Happy memories you share with the bride
- Your thoughts on love and marriage
- How beautiful the other bridesmaids look
- Your well-wishes for the happy couple
How long should a mother of the groom speech be?
The mother of the groom speech may not be part of traditional wedding speeches, but it’s a beautiful opportunity for a mother to share her love, support, and best wishes for her son and his new spouse. This speech typically lasts between 3 to 5 minutes and, if you’re following traditional speech order, it’s likely to be one of the final speeches at the reception (though this is flexible).
There’s no strict format for a mother of the groom speech, but we recommend including:
- A welcome to the family for the new bride
- Your happiness that the groom has found someone so special
- Fond memories of the groom’s childhood
- Heartfelt advice
- A final, celebratory toast
The bottom line on speech length
Speeches are an important and traditional part of the wedding reception. They’re the perfect opportunity for the wedding party and other loved ones to share their thoughts and feelings with the newlyweds.
As mentioned earlier, the ideal speech length is between 5 and 7 minutes. This ensures everyone has ample time to share their thank-yous and advice, while keeping this portion of the wedding engaging and enjoyable for your guests, maintaining their attention throughout.
We’ve got plenty of great tips, tricks, and wedding speech structures to help you get started if you’re unsure about what to include. And, to see how long your wedding speech should be in practice, check out our wedding speech examples.
You Might Also Like…
- Wedding Speech Examples
- Top 10 Groom Speech Examples
- Top 10 Bride Speech Examples
- Top 10 Mother of the Bride Speech Examples
- Top 10 Father of the Bride Speech Examples
- Wedding Traditional Speech Order: Who Says What & When
- The Best Wedding Day Timeline
Happy Planning!
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